kellyclinger.com

It was just a normal Monday. I was sitting on my bed putting make-up on and my cell phone rang. I looked down and it showed a name I didn’t recognize. (I program names in my phone & sometimes can’t remember who they are!!)

Me: “Hello?”

Lady: “Hey Kelly, it’s Katie from the adoption agency. Guess who had their baby?”

((I suddenly remember who she is. Several weeks ago I was ministering to a girl who was 33 weeks pregnant. She had gone to the abortion clinic and my friend John helped her choose LIFE. She was thinking about adoption so he put her in touch with me, and I gave her what little information I knew because we are planning to adopt. I put her in touch with an adoption consultant (Katie). I talked to her about Jesus and how much He loves her baby. We texted back & forth for a while and that was that.))

Me: “Aww! What a blessing! Thanks so much for letting me know!”

Katie: “Well, there’s more to the story. She said that you made such an impression on her heart and that she would like for you and your husband to adopt her baby. It’s a boy. He is 6 lbs. 9 oz. and he’s perfectly healthy.”

SILENCE.

Me: “Ummm…WOW. Now? We haven’t even had our home study done yet. How would we do this? I’m shocked!!”

Katie: “We can rush everything and work the details out. First, you will have to get your FBI fingerprints, references and have someone do your home study as soon as possible. He will go into cradle care until you can bring him home, but once your fingerprints come back you can come see him. Kelly, I really think this may be your son. Call your husband and talk it over with him and call me back.”

Honestly, there was nothing to discuss. We knew this would happen one day. We’ve always been open to the fact that God was going to bring babies into our home. Were we ready? No. Are you EVER ready for a baby? No.

I called Matt at work and he was on board. I called my parents because I knew we would need their help and they were on board. I called the lady here who was going to do our home study and set up an appointment for the next day.

I called Katie back and said, “Ok…here we go!”

The birth Mom had asked to speak to me, so I called her hospital room. She explained that she had been praying about what to do and our conversation kept coming back to her. She said she knew we would raise her baby to love Jesus. I told her how grateful I was. I hung up the phone and wept.

The next few hours are a blur. I emailed pictures of us, our dog, our home, etc. so that Katie could show the birth Mom. I printed out over 150 forms that needed to be filled out in less than 24 hours. I set up physicals for all of us. I sent out reference letters to 5 friends and had to quickly explain what was going on. I made copies of birth certificates, driver’s licenses, insurance cards, marriage license, etc. Matt told his boss that he would have to go to Florida for a few days to meet his new son. We would all drive down together and then he would have to fly back alone so he didn’t lose his job.

A few hours passed. My hand was cramping from writing so much so fast! Matt and I talked about what the baby’s name would be, and we had fun laughing about how funny so many names sound with Clinger. I needed a dollar for every time I said, “No, Matt, we can’t name our son Jeb…or Claude…or Samson.” I think it was nervous laughter. We were scared, but we were so happy.

Then my phone rang, and I saw it was Katie.

“Well, she gave me all of her information. I was about to give her a few details and then she hung up on me. Now, she won’t answer my phone call. My gut tells me not to try to call her again tonight, so I will talk to the social worker at the hospital in the morning. Pray.”

I hung up and began praying…and crying. It’s funny how 4 hours ago I didn’t even know this baby existed. And now I feel like he is ours.

I didn’t sleep at all that night. I started to make a list of everything we would need. Our kids are almost 10 and 16, so we haven’t had a baby in a very long time! I was so excited…cautious but excited.

The next morning I waited to hear something. I kept getting texts from family and friends and all who were praying asking for an update. I was so tempted to just get in the car and head to Florida, but I knew we HAD to get our home study done before we left to go anywhere. I tried to stay busy while I was waiting, but I was so anxious. I pulled up an archived Laura Hackett set from the Prayer Room, and she began singing, “There’s a peace that comes to my soul when I remember You’re in control. There’s a joy that comes to my heart when I remember I’m not my own.” Sigh. Yes. His leadership is perfect.

Late in the afternoon, I finally got word that the birth Mom had chosen another couple. She had reservations about us not living in Florida and about him having to go somewhere temporarily until we were able to bring him home. So she chose a couple that couldn’t have children and were ready to bring him home that day.

Oh how I cried and cried. Our kids sobbed. Matt got home from work and broke down. We had to tell our families that it wasn’t time yet for a new grandchild, nephew and cousin.

I’m still fighting back tears as I type these words. They are bittersweet tears. Selfishly, I’m crying because I wanted that sweet baby boy. But the reality is that this girl chose LIFE because of people like me and my friends John, Patte, Heather, Allura, Deanna, Beth, Michelle, Brad, Andrew, Joe, Darby and ALL who choose to spend hours, days and weeks pleading and praying for Mom’s not to kill their babies. She chose adoption because I spent 2 days talking to her about Jesus. So, while we didn’t bring home a son this week, another family did. THE DEVIL STILL LOST.

When it comes down to it and all of the why’s are flooding our minds, do we REALLY trust that His leadership is perfect and ALL His ways are good? I can honestly say YES, I do. Our babies are out there. God knows who and when. And He ALWAYS knows better than I do.

Colton Isaiah – Mommy, Daddy, brother and sister are all waiting on you! We can’t wait to meet you one day soon!

“Though I cannot see, still my heart believes…”